Sticking it out.

The day I was going to post this blog online was the day I knew it would be going up onto the GurlsTalk page...which was a pretty daunting prospect... knowing that people would now be reading some of the moments that were far from my finest.

I was really worried about certain people judging me, for a) thinking I didn't have the right to talk about this but also b) because lets face it, knowing people know you shagged some guy in Vegas and then got totally mugged off is not gonna fill you with warm lovely feelings... or that you were unable to go for drinks ever without suggesting you make a call. BUT, I've received so many amazing messages from both total strangers AND friends, my Dad even called me up the other day to tell me how proud he was of me, moments into the call I realised he's just read about Boat Guy... I was like 'Oh no, that one was a bit raw for you to read as my Dad no? He replied, "Ah who cares, I'm just really proud of what you're doing"

So, thanks for the messages, and the encouragement and the questions! Honestly ask away, it makes me laugh, getting DM's from people; What happened with Instagram DM Guy? Did he find out about Boat guy? Is the Vegas story true? One of the things I've been asked most though, is advice on how to stick it out in certain social situations and in general so this blog post is dedicated to that, I'm no expert AT ALL, BUT this is how I'VE done it... if it helps in anyway great and like I said feel free to DM me or email me and I'll always give you the honest answer...

1) Sweets and Coffee - They say people with addictive personalities just swap addictions, well since cutting out drink I can't get enough of coffee and sweets. I work on the doors in East London for my very awesome friend and one of my favourite humans EVER Harry James (those that know, know!) and this used to mean me getting drunk or having cheeky lines in order to get through the night... when I stopped drinking I didn't want to stop doing the doors for him SO I now have a table filled with sweets and depending on the venue, coffee! I now actually take home the extra cash I've earned instead of spending it on the night seeing it as 'A free night' - no thanks, I'll take the 'free shoes' that I'm gonna buy with the cash.

2) Don't change everything - People think stopping drinking means you have to sit at home in your pants doing nothing...no, it means now you can go do loads of things, and just miss out on the hangover the next day. I still go to events, dinners, holidays, dates... once you've proved to yourself you can do all those things without drinking, it becomes the norm. Just do them a few times - and I found that saying 'I'm not drinking tonight' wont work, people will try and persuade you, whereas if you say 'I don't drink' it's a bit of a dick move to then try and push drink on someone and 9 times out of ten, they'll be pleasantly surprised! (also you're a well cheap date!)

3) Surround yourself with awesome people - Not everyone will be into the idea of you not drinking, but those people become clear really quickly... or not clear, as you don't see or hear from them anymore! Refer to previous blogpost Friend or Faux. The people who encourage you and still wanna hang out or are interested in doing sober things...spend more time with them! OR if your lucky like me and have your very own Ben (also sober) who writes an awesome blog, chat to someone who you love and loves you about how your feeling, those saturday nights when you feel REALLY FUCKING ANNOYED AND BORED, I'd call him and we'd both be in the same boat and chat our way through it!

4) Read and write!- I read up so much on peoples sober experiences, How do you feel after 30 days, how 1 year off booze changed my life etc etc, use Google for some good, and read! It helped me! I also read 'The Unexpected Joy Of Being Sober' Listened to a podcast called 'Home' and I wrote (obvs, you're reading it)- that helped me enormously! I'll get together a list of books that have helped too!

5) Find what makes you tick - For me it's working out everyday, I found Blok and it's been a saviour, exercise has always been a big part of my life but now its even bigger. It's sociable and makes you feel good with all that endorphin release as well as making your body look better... win's all round really?!

I was also lucky enough to be introduced to Blaize who founded The London Wellness Studio... a place where you can go drink tea, meditate, chat and basically chill the fuck out. I met her through my friend Makeda (who is another huge part of my journey) and I consider them gaurdian angels, but the type of angels that are into really beautiful clothes and don't mince their words. I set up Paradise at The London Wellness Studio with Blaize - an evening where you eat great food from Lele's, do yoga, soundbath, meditation and just generally TREAT.Yo.SELF.

6. An app called 'I am Sober' it keeps tracks how many days you're on, your milestones and how much money you've saved...nothing nicer than seeing poundsigns where zero's used to be!

Hope this is in someway helpful but yeah there's a few things thatI've found have helped... when I think of more I'll do another post on this.